The List
by Weatherbee
Summary: In the weeks before their wedding, Edward asks Bella to make a list of things she’d like to experience before her transformation.
1. Title Page

The List

By WComings

Rating: Teen in later chapters for violence/language

Pairing: Edward/Bella

Genre: Horror/Drama/Romance

Summary: In the weeks before their wedding, Edward asks Bella to make a list of things she'd like to experience before her transformation…

Disclaimer: You know who owns it and It isn't me.


	2. Part One

The List

Part 1 of ?

By WComings

Rating: Teen in later chapters for violence/language

Pairing: Edward/Bella

Genre: Horror/Drama/Romance

Summary: In the weeks before their wedding, Edward asks Bella to make a list of things she'd like to experience before her transformation…

Disclaimer: You know who owns it and It isn't me.

"Did you bring the list?" Edward asked, whisper quiet. He was laying back, eyes closed, on the damp greenery of the meadow. I sighed. "Yes, I did. It isn't finished yet." He cracked his eye open to look at me. "There isn't much time left until the wedding, not to rush you…" He paused, and then said, "Why don't you tell me what you have?" Blood rushed to my cheeks and I looked down at my hands twisting in my lap. He smiled a crooked grin as he sat up. "Bella, it really can't be that bad." Oh yes, it really could. I pulled the folded sheet of notebook paper from the pocket of my jeans and slowly unfolded it. I read the list to myself and frowned, then handed it over to him. "Bella's Top Ten List of Things to do Before Becoming a Cullen. Nice title." He laughed. "Edward…" I warned him. This was embarrassing enough already, without him making jokes over the title. "I couldn't very well put vampire, what if I lost it?" "Very true." He agreed with a smirk.

"Number ten. Go to a Rock Concert." He paused. "You've never been?" I shook my head. "When we get back to the house we can see who is playing around here soon. I heard Linkin Park was going to be in Seattle either this month or next. We could go see them if you like." He trailed off and read the next number. His laughter was so loud that birds took flight from their perches in the surrounding trees. "Number nine. Get drunk? Oh Bella…" and I turned red again.

--

Linkin Park had a concert scheduled just a week out. I don't know how Edward pulled it, but he was able to get two tickets to the sold out show. Alice had complained loudly about not being able to get tickets for her and Jasper, but Edward promised we would go to another show with them after my transformation, when I was able.

We dressed simply in jeans, sweaters and jackets, as it was chillier than usual that day. Edward drove to Seattle, our fingers lay tangled in between us on the center console. We didn't talk much, but it was a comfortable silence. When we arrived at the venue, he opened the car door for me. "Are you excited?" he breathed in my ear. "Very." I smiled at him. He took my arm and we got in line for the doors. I noticed some of the girls in line turning to look at him and I couldn't blame them, I wouldn't have been able to pry my eyes away either. He kept me close to him, his body a comforting weight like the promise in gold wrapped around my finger. The wait wasn't very long and we were inside. The venue was huge and the opening band had already started. "Let's move to the front, shall we?" He asked and I nodded. He pulled me through the crowd by the hand. Soon, we were right in front of the stage. The opening band was more noise than music. Edward agreed. The second opener was better, and by the end of their set, I was eagerly anticipating Linkin Park to come on. I had grown to enjoy their music a lot, even if I still only knew the words to the choruses.

The lights dimmed and people were pushing their way to the front. The band was taking their spots on stage when a body moved past us. I felt Edward's hands where they rest on my hips tighten, his body went rigid. "Edward?" I asked. "Edward?" Stupidly, I tried to shake him, forgetting myself for a moment. He turned to look at me and there was no recognition in his eyes. I gasped in horror and understanding - the bloodlust in Edward had taken hold. Suddenly, he was moving through the crowd, moving away from me.


	3. Part Two

The List

Part 2 of ?

By WComings

Rating: Teen in later chapters for violence/language

Pairing: Edward/Bella

Genre: Horror/Drama/Romance

Summary: In the weeks before their wedding, Edward asks Bella to make a list of things she'd like to experience before her transformation…

Disclaimer: You know who owns it and It isn't me.

I pushed my way through the crowd in the direction Edward had gone. With the room so dark and all the people, it wasn't long before I lost him. When I was finally towards the side wall, by the speakers, the crowd cleared and I noticed an exit. I stopped for a moment and looked around, hoping that Edward hadn't pursued the person out of the venue. My stomach churned at the thought.

With no sight of him inside, I pushed through the double doors. "EDWARD!" I yelled at the same time the cell phone in my pocket started vibrating. I flipped it open, praying it was him. It wasn't.

"You need to get in the car and you need to drive as fast as you can."

"Alice! What's going on? Drive? Drive where? I don't have the keys." I was panicking. Alice was talking so fast I could barely understand her when she said, "Edward's had an accident, you need to get away." She paused, someone was talking to her on her end, it sounded like Jasper. When Alice spoke next she sounded much calmer. "Bella, We're on our way right now. Are you still inside?"

"What do you mean accident?" I asked, knowing full well what she was about to tell me. "The girl he followed out of the arena? She's dead." My blood turned to ice.

"Bella, listen to me. If Edward gets close to you, I'm afraid he might hurt you, he won't be able to control himself. You need to get lost in the crowd. I'll call you as soon as we arrive. We'll be there in fifteen minutes. Are you inside?" I turned around and tried to re-enter through the double doors, but they were locked. "No Alice, I'm outside and the doors are locked. I'm going to have to walk around to the front." "Are there people around you?" She asked. "I'm alone." I was shaking, I'd never feared for my life as much as I did at that moment.

I was afraid of Edward and ashamed for feeling afraid of him, but his eyes… the only time I'd seen him close to that far gone was when he was battling Victoria. My mind skipped back and forth between that battle in the woods and his adamant refusal of my idea to watch him hunt.

I quickly sidled up to the front of the building, my eyes blindly searching in the dark for any sight of Edward. Since I was moving sideways, I didn't see the man standing against the wall smoking a cigarette and I bumped into him. I screamed and he grabbed my shoulder to steady me. "Hey sweetie. You okay?" "Fine." I said and ran towards the front doors to the venue. I was glad I still had my ticket when they asked for it again. I told Alice I was inside and she let me go, telling me they were now about eight minutes out.

I slid into a booth in a dark corner of the closed bar. I knew Alice told me to get lost in the crowd, but I also knew that I wouldn't be able to stand for much longer. I was so tense that my muscles were locking up. I curled into the bend in the booth as fat tears began to slide down my face. Soon, I was sobbing uncontrollably. Edward had killed a girl tonight. A girl whose blood had called to him so strongly that he couldn't control himself. I didn't know what to think about that, so I pushed it out of my mind and focused on trying to calm down. Help was on it's way in the form of Alice and the other Cullens. I'd never been more thankful for Alice's gift than I was right now.

I wiped my eyes on my sleeve and sat up. I wondered how long it would take Edward to regain control. I couldn't help but think this was all my fault. The girl killed tonight died because of a list I'd created. Not only did I feel guilty, but I knew when Edward came back to himself, he'd be riddled with guilt. My chest ached. I pulled my legs close to my body and wrapped my arms around them, trying to comfort myself while my mind was reeling. My phone began to vibrate in my pocket. I fished it out and flipped it open, "Alice, did you find him?" I asked, but it wasn't Alice on the other line. "Bella, where are you?" It was Edward.


	4. Part Three

Part Three

--

"Edward." I gasped as I panicked. I didn't know what to do, should I hang up until Alice arrived or go get lost in the crowd like she'd suggested? 

"Bella. I…" he trailed off, seemingly fighting to find the right words. "I made a mistake." His voice was thick with regret. "I killed someone tonight." 

"Edward, where are you?" I asked him as I stood and began to pace the length of the bar. It was hard to hear with the band playing behind me. 

"I am sitting in my car. Come sit with me, _please_. I need you." 

Was it a trick, or was he in control? 

"Edward, Alice will be here any moment." I told him. "She told me to stay where I am until she arrives." I was speaking too fast, the fear was evident in my voice.

"Don't be afraid Bella," He whispered. "I would never hurt you. I really need you here with me right now." 

"I can't. I'm sorry. You should understand that." The tears were sliding down my face again. I was so torn…

One of overhead lights caught on my engagement ring and I held it up to my face. I couldn't tear my eyes away.

Edward was hurting and he needed me…

"Don't you love me Bella?" 

His voice was pure silk, but it wasn't desire that shot through me. His words were like ice water running through my veins and I stopped dead in my tracks. I knew now that Edward was not in control. He would never ask such a thing. I flipped the phone shut and moved quickly over to the crowd of people watching the show. I made my way to the middle of the floor. I held the silver cell phone tightly in my hand, willing it to vibrate, praying Alice was already here.

I watched the band perform two songs in a daze before the phone went off.

"Bella, it's Alice. He's gone, running home through the woods. We're outside the door. Exit through the side entrance you came through earlier." 

"Okay. I'll be there in a minute." I said as I slowly made my way through the crowd. When I exited the doors it was pure relief to see Alice and Jasper standing hand in hand waiting for me. 

Alice quickly pulled me into a hug and Jasper began to work his calming magic. The fear and panic faded away and I no longer felt like I was going to collapse. 

"Alice, he tried to get me to come to him." I told her.

"I know. Let's get to the car and we can talk on the way home."

We were in a very public place and someone had died here tonight. It took me until that moment to realize that the less anyone saw of us, the better.

Alice and Jasper led me to Edward's car. Jasper opened the back door and I slid in, Alice followed gracefully. "How did you get here?" I asked. 

"We rode with Emmett and Rosalie. They are… well… destroying the evidence. To put it nicely." Alice took my hand in her stony grasp. "Bella, I'm sorry you had to see this. Edward hasn't slipped up in such a long time…" She trailed off. 

"I'm just glad that you called me earlier. Otherwise, I might have gone out to meet Edward at his car." I shuddered at the thought and then felt more calm coming from Jasper. I sighed and leaned heavily back in my seat.

Suddenly, Alice leaned towards me and asked. "Bella, you aren't going to cancel the wedding, are you?"

"No! Alice, why? Did you see me canceling the wedding?" As much as I wanted to cancel the wedding before this happened, tonight's events would not sway me to change the path I had already decided to take.

"No, but I do see Edward trying to convince you to. He's going to be horrible to live with for awhile." She told me. Her voice was full of grief for her brother.

" Well, I'm not canceling the wedding." I told her. "It won't be long before I'm like you and situations like this won't happen."

Alice smiled sadly and squeezed my hand tighter.

"We aren't always perfect. We will always make mistakes and there will always be danger." Alice said, looking into my eyes.

"I know that." I told her.

It was mostly silent the rest of the ride. My mind was replaying the night over and over, from the moment Edward stiffened against me to the second I snapped my cell phone shut on his call. 

As we got closer to the hidden driveway, Alice turned towards me and said "Edward is going to be in the garage when we get home. He is now in control but I still don't want to take any chances. I would take you home Bella, but I know he would show up at your window…" Alice trailed off. "Should I call Charlie and tell him you're staying here tonight? " She asked. 

I shook my head. "He already knows I'm going to be out late. He's loosened up a bit since the engagement." 

Too soon, but not soon enough, we were parked in the garage. I was torn in half. Part of me was happy that Edward had no harm come to him. That part of me couldn't wait to look into his golden eyes, embrace his stone cold body. The other part was nervous and frightened, and despite myself, my heart was beating right along with those feelings. I knew Alice, Jasper and Edward could hear my heart going crazy, yet Jasper did nothing to calm me, almost like he wanted Edward to hear the nights effect on me. 

Edward was standing with his back to the wall, eyes closed. His appearance was impeccable, and I was so grateful their was no visible sign of his 'incident' earlier.

I left the car and slowly moved towards him, flanked by both Alice and Jasper.

I slid my hand up to cup his cheek and he put his hand over mine, eyes still closed. 

"Bella, I'm so sorry." 

He opened his eyes then and I gasped and took a step back. There would be no looking into his golden eyes tonight, how could I have forgotten?


End file.
